


Marry Me

by jus2kyu



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: College, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mentions of Junsang, Mentions of Ryeonseungseok, Mutual Pining, Seungyul friendship, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2020-11-22 21:27:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 12,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20880938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jus2kyu/pseuds/jus2kyu
Summary: in which hangyul asks his bestfriend yohan to marry him out of the blue and yohan isn’t having it





	1. Chapter 1

“.. and that’s why I think you should marry me.”

“Wha-?!” Yohan whips his head up so fast, he felt his neck almost snap.

“Haven’t you been listening?” His bestfriend rolls his eyes. Hangyul props his head on his arm and pouts. “I’ve been giving you reasons to walk down the aisle with me for the past ten minutes and you’re telling me you heard none of it?”

Yohan winces, still confused but also apologetic for not paying attention to Hangyul the entire time the younger was talking, but then again, they were in the library trying to squeeze in some last-minute review for their Biology exam tomorrow. Or at least that was the plan.

“Kinda misses the point of focusing on studying , doesn’t it?” Yohan rolls his eyes back at Hangyul. His bestfriend really needs to stop spouting bullshit sometimes.

“So what do you think?” Hangyul looks at Yohan expectantly.

“What do I think about what?” Yohan answers, clearly confused. Hangyul better stop with his mind games because the elder swears he’s losing braincells by the second.

“Marrying me.” The way Hangyul says it so casually makes Yohan pause; he’s waiting for his bestfriend to laugh his stupid laugh and follow up with a “just kidding”, but it doesn’t come.

“I can’t do that.” comes Yohan’s answer. He doesn’t understand why he gives this kind of response instead of a flat out ‘no’ or a ‘what the hell, Hangyul’.

“Why not?” Hangyul has the audacity to pout once more.

“Because!” Yohan argues in a tone that makes it sound like it’s common sense. Hangyul looks at him like he’s waiting for Yohan to continue, so he does. “We’re not even dating.”

Hangyul looks at Yohan for a second and the elder suddenly feels self-conscious. His bestfriend looks at him straight in the eye before asking, “Do you want us to?”

Yohan opens his mouth to respond but he stops at the unexpected question that catches him off guard. They sit there staring at each other for what seemed like minutes before Yohan realizes that Hangyul asked him a question and the latter was probably still waiting for an answer.

“You’re not making sense, Gyul.” Yohan says, quickly lowering his head and not meeting Hangyul’s gaze because the open Human Anatomy book in front of him suddenly looked interesting.

“Come on, you make me happy and I bring color to your dull world.” Hangyul says like it’s some sort of business deal and he’s negotiating. “We’ve been unseparable from the start so what difference does it make that I want us to be together ‘til the end?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> by Yohan logic, you can’t tie the knot without a piece of rope in the first place

_“We’ve been unseparable from the start so what difference does it make that I want us to be together ‘til the end?”_

Yohan turns soft at that. He hasn’t even paid attention to his heart that’s beating like crazy, or his hands that were sweaty and shaking.

What Hangyul said was true. For as long as he could remember, it had always been him and Hangyul and Hangyul and him. Taekwondo matches, dance camps, sleepovers, anime marathons, lifeguard duties in the community pool for extra cash during summer, street food ventures in the night market, college parties, all-nighters during exams week, spontaneous drives, even each other’s family gatherings— everything. When Yohan looks back at his life, Hangyul was always going to be there.

But why was Hangyul suddenly acting this way?

Sure, Yohan found that his best friend, who he’d known since he was in his diapers and would wade stark naked in a small inflatable pool Hangyul’s dad had bought for them to play in when they were 3, had grown up to be a good-looking guy.

But they were _friends_. Raised almost like brothers. You can’t date someone you’re attached to in _that_ way.

Yohan isn’t a stranger to taking risks but he knows that what he has with Hangyul is too precious to even think about compromising with adolescent feelings. He thought Hangyul felt the same but here they were, with said bestfriend blurting out a freaking marriage proposal.

They weren’t even dating!

Which, by the way, Yohan thinks is the first step for getting into a committed relationship.

You can’t tie the knot without a piece of rope in the first place.

This makes Yohan look back to his past relationships. When was the last time he dated someone?

He’s had his fair share of dating both girls and boys back in high school and last year, when they finally entered college— together, still, and sharing an apartment with Yohan as a Music Education major and Hangyul getting into the Dance program like they had both planned to. They had started living under one roof and it only dawns on Yohan now, as Hangyul looks at him fondly from across the table, that he hadn’t been interested in dating once he’d fallen into a domestic routine with Hangyul.

Unbeknownst to Yohan, it was the same way for his bestfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short drabble i wrote in class bc i’m bored :3 hope you guys like it!!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Hangyul has never felt like he needed a significant other to fill a void inside of him because 1) there was no void 2) if there were, Yohan would’ve already filled it and 3) Yohan makes him feel like his life is complete

Hangyul had Yohan and that was enough for him. People enter relationships for various reasons and he knows that most of the time, it’s because people feel lonely and don’t want to be alone. Maybe they felt like something was missing from their life and thought that getting a significant other would fill the void.

That’s the thing though— Hangyul has (fortunately) never felt that way.

And the reason?

It was sitting in front of him, cheeks pink, eyes wide and flustered. Hangyul wants to coo. Yes, _coo_, as one would with a baby.

Kim Yohan, his nerd of a bestfriend, made Hangyul’s life feel complete.

Hangyul decides that he doesn’t need anyone to accompany him to see the new Star Wars movie because Yohan would’ve already reserved tickets for the two of them one week earlier than the premiere. That he doesn’t need someone else to finish half of the chocolate crepe cake slice from his favorite coffee shop once he’s too full because Yohan’s already shoveling the rest of it into his mouth before Hangyul offers. He doesn’t need to call (read: bother) a significant other in the middle of the night to come over to his apartment when he’s having a panic attack hours before a performance because Yohan’s already knocking on his door before the first tear falls and has him engulfed in a hug the moment Hangyul starts shaking. He most certainly does not need a crush who motivates him to attend class either because Yohan always manages to forcibly push him inside the lecture room when he thinks about skipping, holding the door in place so Hangyul can’t get out.

Because the way Yohan cooks dinner for the both of them in their shared apartment while Hangyul takes care of washing the dishes; the way they stumble drunkenly back to their apartment from a night out with their friends, only to wake up on the floor, both dreading hangovers; the way they’d set up pillow forts in the middle of their living room just like they did when they were in elementary school; the way Yohan is the first person Hangyul sees in the morning and the last person he talks to at night; the way bad days at school don’t seem that bad anymore when Hangyul thinks of coming home to their apartment and seeing Yohan...

The way Yohan has found his way into every corner, crack and crevice of Hangyul’s life has the younger realizing that this is exactly how he would like to spend the rest of his days.

With Yohan.

Preferably married.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is this enough fluff because idk,,,, 
> 
> thanks for the kudos everyone <33


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Yohan has a coffee obsession and Hangyul is surprisingly fixated towards marriage

The topic of Hangyul’s marriage proposal to Yohan was dropped that day in the library.

Hangyul couldn’t forget how Yohan looked after he confessed. His best friend’s face was as red as ever and he looked like he wanted to say something, but instead, Yohan just sighed and pushed his notebook towards Hangyul.

“Quiz me?” The raven-haired boy had said. And Yohan said it with that shy smile of his so what was Hangyul gonna do? Say ‘no’?

To be honest, Hangyul lied.

He hadn’t been giving Yohan reasons to marry him for the past 10 minutes as he’d said.

He noticed that Yohan kinda spaced out a bit during their review session and decided to snap him out of it. Of course, waving his hand in front of his friend’s face was too boring so he did it in his own Hangyul way.

_“.. and that’s why I think you should marry me.”_

He made sure to say it louder than usual to get Yohan’s attention. And it worked.

Confessing in the end wasn’t part of Hangyul’s plan but there they were, with Yohan responding positively as if he liked Hangyul, too.

That really upped Hangyul’s confidence. Seungyoun had been telling him that he was sure Yohan liked Hangyul back, but Seungyoun wasn’t exactly the kind of person Hangyul would trust 100%. (_How many times do I have to apologize for telling you the wrong date for Costume Day in 8th grade, Gyul?)_

They’d been teased for being a married couple loads of times and they just shrugged and laughed it off. They were best friends. It was only normal for them to be that close, right?

Except Hangyul knew it wasn’t normal to feel jealous; to feel possessive and insecure.

He never acted upon it, though. He never stared down anyone getting too close to Yohan in the club. But does he subconsciously put his hand on Yohan’s waist as he leads him away from the crowd? No comment.

He never threatens Yohan’s admirers in school, especially when they give him chocolates and roses and teddy bears on Valentine’s Day. But does he leave a pint of cookie dough ice cream with a pink bow inside their freezer for Yohan to find because he knows that’s what his best friend likes the most and would most probably top anything else anyone would give him? Again, no comment. God, let Hangyul breathe, will you?

Hangyul doesn’t know when this behavior of his started. He was sure he didn’t just wake up one day knowing that he likes his best friend like that. The way he started to love his best friend in an “i-want-us-to-be-more-than-best-friends” way happened slowly, starting with the little things.

Like how he found Yohan’s coffee obsession obnoxious at first.

And then he found it endearing how just a small cup of coffee would change his best friend’s attitude in a split second, and how a large cup of coffee would leave him a jittery mess.

And then Hangyul began thinking about Yohan when he’s walking alone in public and suddenly smells coffee. He thinks of Yohan, too, when he sees tiny and hidden cafés on the street, knowing the elder would want to try them out and even hold their study dates (read: sessions) there.

And then he sees a thermal mug with cute cats on them during his family’s trip to Japan so he is reminded of Yohan and buys it for him. _Because zero-waste lifestyle, right?_ And any excuse to buy Yohan a gift, he’d take it.

And then Hangyul starts memorizing Yohan’s orders: iced mint latte with almond milk during hot days, gingerbread latte during winter, and salted caramel macchiato with a full shot of espresso for all-nighters.

He starts buying them for Yohan. On Sunday mornings when Hangyul goes out for a jog and Yohan decides to sleep in. On Thursday nights when it’s already past 8 and Yohan isn’t in their dorm yet (Hangyul finds the nerd in the library, sets Yohan’s coffee down in front of him, and sits down to nap on the table. Yohan shakes him awake a few hours later when he’s finished and they walk back to their apartment— most times in comfortable silence).

When people fall in love with their best friend, they try to hide it— scared it would affect their friendship. For a while, this has been Hangyul’s problem. He does his best to act like it doesn’t bother him and he expects an Oscar award soon because no drastic changes take place.

Again, Hangyul doesn’t know when he started falling in love with his best friend. But he does remember the day he decided he wanted to date him.

***

Seungwoo, new to their friendship circle at that time, asked Hangyul if he was Yohan’s boyfriend.

“What?” Hangyul says, scandalized. “No.”

His hyung had the audacity to laugh. He pats Hangyul on the back. “Then stop acting like it.”

“What do you mean ‘stop acting like it’?” Hangyul asks, genuinely confused. He ignores the tiny thought at the back of his head wondering if Seungwoo’s saying this because he liked Yohan.

“I’m just saying,” Seungwoo says in that father-like tone of his, and Hangyul knows he’s going to supply some wise, life-changing advice that would be stuck in the younger’s mind for the rest of the week. “the way you two act around each other can give others the wrong impression. People keep asking me if Yohan was single. I guess they want to ask him out or something. They ask about you, too.”

Hangyul doesn’t hear the last part clearly because he stopped listening after hearing about people wanting to ask Yohan out. At first, he laughs in his mind smugly because he knows none of them will be good enough for Yohan.

Then the dread sets in because people are interested in trying to win Yohan’s heart.

And there’s a possibility (note: _slim _but still) that they’ll succeed.

Because Yohan is a softie with a big heart who always, _always_ sees the good in people.

Hangyul imagines Yohan introducing a nameless, faceless being as the love of his life and he wants to throw up because he’s Yohan’s soulmate and the only hands Yohan’s should be intertwined with is his.

The following week, Seungwoo isn’t surprised when Hangyul sits beside him in the cafeteria and tells him “So I’m in love with Yohan. No big deal, right?”, as if the younger was trying to convince himself, too.

Between the two best friends, Hangyul is surprisingly the one who’s more open about his feelings.

But that isn’t enough reason to stop Seungwoo from hitting Hangyul’s head when the latter asks him for marriage proposal ideas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more self-indulgent pining ;)
> 
> how’d you like this chapter? idk if i’m doing a good job so tell me if y’all have suggestions or smth <3


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which yohan has a vein kink, i guess?

Hangyul’s “marriage proposal” doesn’t get brought up anymore after his and Yohan’s weird moment in the library.

Yohan thinks maybe Hangyul really was just messing with him that day. He tries to not feel disappointed.

Why would he be disappointed? It’s not like he wanted Hangyul to actually get down on one knee and pull out a freaking ring, right? They weren’t ready for the married life. They were best friends. They weren’t dating. They were still in college. And _again_, they weren’t dating.

But Hangyul asked Yohan if he wanted them to date and he’d never felt that conflicted in his life.

Yohan never thought of dating Hangyul before. Okay maybe once. Or twice. Okay, _fine_, more.

But Yohan never entertained those thoughts. He felt like he wasn’t allowed to. Everytime Hangyul introduced him as his best friend, Yohan would make sure to bury his feelings a little bit deeper. That had been the plan: to repress until no feelings are left.

Until that day in the library when Hangyul came with a freaking excavator and dug them all up. Everything had resurfaced, leaving Yohan an emotional mess.

He hasn’t stopped thinking about it; thinking of the ways he could’ve answered Hangyul. Yohan regretted not flirting back, if that was Hangyul flirting. Or at least saying something witty, instead of gay-panicking and asking to be quizzed about the freaking Central Nervous System.

What bothered Yohan the most was what if Hangyul was serious and thought he wasn’t interested because Yohan, being the clown that he is, was unable to say something intelligible and shot him down in the end.

Whatever Hangyul thought about their conversation, Yohan never got to know because the following week was a rush. They had to deal with exams, deadlines, and requirements. Not to mention extracurriculars, plus their work shifts. Hangyul works part time at an artisan shop that sells secondhand vinyls, vintage comic books and pretty stationery, while Yohan plays piano for the local daycare and is stationed as the receptionist during weekends for parents the inquire about enrolling their children there.

Things don’t get awkward and Yohan is relieved. The thought of things changing is scary to him.

On Friday, they get invited to a gig at one of their favorite clubs to visit. It’s supposed to be chill, no EDM; just a couple of local bands in the indie scene playing a few sets. Wooseok, Seungwoo and Seungyoun’s other boyfriend, was performing as a duet with a kid named Junho. Eunsang seemed excited about it, which was all the more reason to go.

Also, cheap beer and good music? What better way to end a stressful week?

And there Yohan was, squeezed into a booth in a nearby diner with Hangyul, Seungwoo, Seungyoun and Eunsang, stuffing their faces with burgers, fries and milkshakes, preparing for when they get tipsy at the gig afterwards.

Seungwoo and Seungyoun were in the middle of interrogating Eunsang about this tiny crush of his that the two dads discovered. Yohan was sitting next to Hangyul, trying to catch the others’ conversation at first but then suddenly becoming aware of his best friend’s presence, which for some reason feels overwhelming to him.

Maybe Hangyul senses his distress and bumps their shoulders together. Yohan looks up and sees a questioning look from Hangyul. _Are you okay?_

Yohan nods and shoots him a smile; he fiddles with the bracelet around Hangyul’s left wrist. Yohan traces the slightly bulging vein along the other’s smooth skin on his arm.

And Hangyul wants to scream.

He wants to swoon at his best friend’s undivided attention; a luxury only he can _and should_ be able to afford. He’s feeling so many emotions at the moment that he subconsciously holds his breath. The noisy diner then becomes background music, and soon, their surroundings quiet down. He focuses on Yohan (and on his loudly beating heart).

Yohan is tracing his veins and the way his fingers touch Hangyul’s skin is careful and calculated, like he was holding something fragile and the entire thing just felt so... intimate.

Hangyul lets himself have this moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> couldn’t sleep so here’s a filler chapter :))
> 
> also peep that ryeonseungseok ot3 insert ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cheap beer, good music and unreciprocated(?) feelings - name a better trio i’ll wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the song featured is “Grey” by EXES

The entire place was buzzing. Or maybe it was the alcohol in Yohan’s system.

The night was great and exactly what Yohan needed. There isn’t too much people, but enough to fill the place with a decent crowd. The bands were amazing. Wooseok and Junho, too, with their cover of Honesty by Pink Sweat$ (which was around the time Yohan downed two shots; the song hit kinda close to home but that’s something he has to keep to himself).

The slight buzz Yohan was feeling told him he should hold his alcohol at this moment; he wasn’t here to get wasted. He just wanted to enjoy some music with his friends and unwind.

But tonight must’ve had a theme because everyone kept performing love songs and Yohan didn’t come here to be attacked.

He was standing in the middle of the crowd, surrounded by his friends, swaying to some song Yohan isn’t familiar with, but it was really good. He makes a mental note to remember some lyrics so he could look it up later.

_I thought I was alone_   
_Too lost to find a home_   
_In someone else_   
_With someone else_

The club was dimly lit, with fluorescent bulbs overhead giving the room a chill energy. The stage had tube lights that softly pulsed to the beat of the music. The room was filled with the strong smell of beer and a hint of the artificial fruity smell of mixed drinks. Music pulsing through your body and alcohol settling into your bloodstream; it was intoxicating.

_You've opened up my soul_   
_Set fire to my bones_   
_And I can tell_   
_You know me well_

Yohan looks around at his friends. Wooseok stood in between Seungwoo and Seungyoun. His head was pressed against Seungwoo’s chest, right by the elder’s neck. They were swaying along to the music. Yohan doesn’t miss the way Wooseok’s hand is interlaced with Seungyoun’s.

_You got me head over heels_   
_And I love how it feels_

The three of them fit perfectly like this and Yohan swells with happiness for his three friends. Things aren’t easy for their kind of love but it’s still love nonetheless and it’s absolutely beautiful.

_You're the one I wanna stay with_   
_You're the one I wanna grey with_

Seungwoo sees him smiling at them and winks at Yohan. Yohan smiles wider, and feeling shy at being caught staring, he puts his cup to his mouth and takes a swig of his rum and coke.

_And I'm safe by your side_   
_When you kiss me goodnight_

Next to Yohan is Eunsang, and he’s standing next to Junho. Yohan met Junho for the first time today and he’s an incredibly talented kid. He was nice and had a great sense of humor. He shared a couple of classes with Eunsang and that’s how they met. The two are underage so they haven’t been drinking, but they’re having fun regardless. Smiles on their faces as they move to the beat, eyes onstage. Junho slips his hand across Eunsang’s waist: a silent gesture of comfort. Yohan sees Eunsang lean closer to Junho; he can see how the former feels secure around the latter. He’s happy for his dongsaeng.

_You're the one I wanna lay with_   
_You're the one I wanna grey with_

His eyes search for the one person who has stubbornly been in Yohan’s mind for the past few days. He sees Hangyul making his way back to their group. The new bottle of beer in his hand says he had finished his second and left for a bit to get his third. Yohan isn’t worried because his best friend can hold his liquor well. Hangyul sees Yohan looking and smiles. Yohan feels relieved.

_Let's stay in bed all day_   
_With you it's not a waste_   
_I'll breathe you in_   
_I'll breathe you in_

The moment they reached the bar a while ago, he was afraid Hangyul had been avoiding him. Normally, they’d be all over each other when they went drinking; arm slung over one’s shoulder, bickering over some useless thing and drinking off of each other’s cups. They still joked and bickered tonight, but Yohan felt as if there was some distance between them.

_With stars inside my eyes_   
_I'll sing for you tonight_   
_And every night_   
_For the rest of my life_

Maybe Hangyul didn’t appreciate Yohan tracing his arm veins and getting up in his personal space a while ago. Yohan was aware of how intimate the skinship was and had been wary if he’d crossed a line. He just found Hangyul’s arm vein interesting and mindlessly started tracing it, imagining different strokes of color literring his friend’s skin. Hangyul tensed up at first when their skin came in contact, but he didn’t pull away.

_You got me head over heels_   
_And I love how it feels_

The way Hangyul looks right now, as the strobe lights danced on him, is absolutely breathtaking. Yohan’s sight is a bit hazy, the lights around the room are aren’t that wild but still intense. The smoke around the room created a thin haze, and the way Hangyul is surrounded by it as he walks closer to where Yohan and his friends were makes Yohan think of a movie scene or a photoshoot set. Hangyul is effortlessly beautiful like that: white shirt with a few buttons open, black jeans with holes around the knee area and black suede Timberlands, with his fluffy blonde hair parted near the middle.

_You're the one I wanna stay with_   
_You're the one I wanna grey with_

Yohan wishes they were back in their apartment, Hangyul’s head on his lap like their usual lazy nights as Yohan reads a manga, absentmindedly raking his fingers through his best friend’s hair as said best friend plays a game on his phone.

_And I'm safe by your side_   
_When you kiss me goodnight_

Hangyul plants himself beside Yohan, bumping his arm to on Yohan’s shoulder. The elder hits him back. Hangyul smiles and playfully pats Yohan’s cheek to turn his head away. It was endearing, having Yohan look at him for a long time with that cute, stupid smile of his. The girl is still singing that beautiful song as Hangyul makes his way towards the one person that means the world to him, he is trying hard not to fall farther for Yohan than he already has. But there are a million butterflies inside Hangyul’s stomach right now and as he sways along to the melody with Yohan, they fly like crazy. Yohan closes his eyes, completely immersed in the song.

_You're the one I wanna lay with_   
_You're the one I wanna grey with_

Yohan feels Hangyul lean closer. His heart suddenly wants to jump out of his chest.

Hangyul smiles to himself and prays he successfully masks the shakiness of voice.

_“Marry me, Kim Yohan.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for all the love for this fic!!!
> 
> ++ had to put in some ryeonseungseok and junsang crumbs


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which yohan gets proposed to by hangyul and he blames it on the alcohol

Hangyul expected a ‘yes’, or a nod at least.

It’s not that he won’t take ‘no’ for an answer— he just couldn’t see why Yohan would reject him.

Which, by the way, Seungyoun says is very vain and annoying of him. (_You don’t have control over Yohan’s feelings, Gyul_)

Didn’t Yohan like him back? (_You could literally j__ust ask him, dumb ass_)

Was he not good enough to marry Yohan? (_Why are you so insistent on marriage? You two aren’t even a couple yet_)

But what Yohan told him at the club was neither yes nor no.

“That’s enough alcohol for you, Gyul.” Yohan had said, taking the bottle out of Hangyul’s hand and leading him away from the stage.

“What?” Hangyul retorts, but lets himself be dragged by his best friend. “I’m not drunk, Yohan.”

“Sure, you aren’t.” Yohan doesn’t seem convinced. He sits them both down in an empty booth and goes to get a glass of water from the bar counter. Hangyul was about to argue when the glass is pushed by Yohan (gently) to his mouth and he feels the coldness of the liquid on his lips. He obeys and drinks, eyes never leaving Yohan’s amused face. Hangyul is reminded of a fussy, nagging mother. He waits as Yohan places the glass on top of the table and sits next to him.

“I’m serious, you know.” Hangyul points out to Yohan.

“About..?” God, Yohan is so slow sometimes.

“Wanting to marry you.” Hangyul confesses. He avoids Yohan’s gaze, feeling his cheeks burn up (he is thankful for the dim lighting), and plays with the condensation on the glass in front of him, watching drops of water slide down to form a tiny puddle on the table.

Yohan freezes. He studies his best friend’s face for any sign that the younger was joking. A million thoughts rush through his slightly intoxicated brain. He frowns. “Stop that.”

“Stop what?” Hangyul looks up at Yohan, feeling guilty as the elder looks distressed. He knows that by confessing, he's putting a huge burden on his best friend's shoulders. He wasn't asking Yohan to take responsibility for his feelings, nor does he want Yohan to feel bad about not returning Hangyul's affection. The last thing he wants is for Yohan to think that he'd somehow ruin their friendship by rejecting him. Hangyul doesn't intend on hurting both Yohan and himself, but if he doesn't tell Yohan how much he loves him anytime soon, he was going to pop a blood vessel. Imagine the _hospital fees_.

“Stop playing with my feelings.” Yohan huffs. Hangyul opens his mouth to answer, but only a loose chuckle escapes. _Of course Yohan doesn’t believe him_.

“I’m not playing.” He throws his hands up a bit in surrender.

“Gyul...” Yohan warns. They were _/this/_ close to crossing a line and once they do, they wouldn’t be able to go back.

Hangyul, exasperated, takes Yohan’s hands into his own. “Why don’t you believe me? What’s wrong with asking you to marry me?”

“What’s wrong with it?” Yohan could not believe his ears. He takes his hands out of Hangyul’s grasp and for a moment Hangyul feels afraid that Yohan might be angry, until Yohan grabs Hangyul by the shoulders as if to shake him back to reality. “You don’t just ask me to marry you out of the blue, Gyul.”

Hangyul’s shoulders drop and Yohan is, again, afraid that his best friend would think he was being rejected and later change his mind. Yohan wants to say more things like ‘_this really isn’t the best place to talk about us_’ and ‘_at least take me out on a date first_’.

But he doesn’t say either because he's still internally screaming from his best friend for proposing to him at the sweetest, most romantic and unexpected time.

“How would you like me to ask you, then?” Hangyul looks at Yohan searchingly, a smile on his lips threatening to form.

Yohan peels his hands off of Hangyul’s shoulder and sighs as he buries his face in them.

Hangyul laughs because he knows he’d caught Yohan off guard. He doesn't miss Yohan’s, “that wasn’t my point, idiot” as he continues giggling over his best friend groaning into his palms. Hangyul knows Yohan was smiling even though the elder tries to hide it.

He looks fondly at the boy sitting next to him and nothing else seemed to matter.

Not their surroundings, not the loud music, not their friends watching them from afar.

Only the contentment that's blooming inside Hangyul's chest.

He doesn't want a future without this blushing mess beside him in it, Hangyul was sure.

And besides, Yohan hasn't given him an answer yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slow burn but with like,,, more fluff <33
> 
> i'm so so grateful for all the encouraging comments, y'all ;'( i'm glad you guys are liking this fic so far!!!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Hangyul loves Halloween and having his hand held

It’s October 1st and Hangyul is exactly where Yohan expects him to be.

On their couch.

Wearing a vampire cape over his pajamas.

Watching a horror movie.

With hands covering his eyes.

Yohan enters and closes the door behind him. It makes a sound that makes Hangyul flinch, making him aware of his best friend’s arrival at the same time.

“You’re here!” Hangyul says excitedly, forgetting the movie. It’s showing a scene where the girl runs away from a masked man with a knife. “Look!”

Hangyul flaps his cape to proudly show his costume and Yohan can’t help but laugh at how childish Hangyul turns during Halloween season.

This was one of the few things they differ in: Hangyul loves Halloween, while Yohan prefers Christmas. The second November creeps in, it will be Yohan getting all up in everyone’s face with Christmas spirit. For now, he’ll let Hangyul have his fun.

“That’s nice.” Yohan says as he sets his things down. “No fangs?”

Hangyul pouts. “It’s hard to eat with those plastic toys on. Do you want some popcorn?”

A bowl is offered and Yohan dunks his hand in. Hangyul pats the space beside him, motioning his best friend to sit.

Hangyul doesn’t think the movie is that scary anymore, now that he has Yohan to laugh with about the main character running too slow and tripping on literally nothing on the ground.

Yohan almost forgets that this is the same best friend who proposed to him twice last month.

—

_Hangyul doesn’t propose to him again after the gig at the club. They were sober by the time they separated from their friends._

_They rode the bus back home that night, with Yohan resting his head on Hangyul’s shoulder all the way back and even dozing off for a bit._

_They walked down the street from the bus stop to their apartment building— a little closer than usual, with the back of their hands brushing against each other’s._

_They both exhaustedly collapsed on their couch. Hangyul’s body practically covered the entire couch so Yohan drapes himself over him._

_“Get up, Yohan,” Hangyul fake-argues. “I have to take a shower.”_

_Yohan hums in response but made no movement, earning a chuckle from his best friend._

_“Aish, so heavy.” Hangyul teases, but put his arms around Yohan nonetheless._

_Yohan smiles, content. After a couple minutes, Yohan finally decides to get off of Hangyul but stops when he hears light snoring coming from his best friend. He must’ve been really tired._

_Yohan is tired, too. And Hangyul’s arms don’t seem to be moving anytime soon so he stays. He had never felt more safe and secure falling asleep in his best friend’s arms._

_When Hangyul wakes up the next day to find them in the same exact position, it takes him a few minutes to realize that it was all real and that he was not dreaming._

_He pretends to still be asleep, enjoying the comforting feeling of having his best friend asleep in his arms, until Yohan stirs sometime past noon and removes himself from on top of him to make brunch for the both of them. Hangyul immediately misses Yohan’s warmth._

_He waits for a few minutes before getting up. He heads towards the kitchen, where Yohan’s standing by the countertop, mixing pancake batter._

_Yohan’s back is turned so he doesn’t see Hangyul walking nearer. He feels Hangyul’s arms around his sides, enveloping him in a gentle hug._

_Yohan jumps, but he’s careful not to spill the powdered pancake mix. His cheeks are burning like crazy so he continues to look down and concentrate on the batter. He seriously can’t look Hangyul in the eyes right now._

_Yohan almost forgets that this is the same best friend who proposed to him twice last month._

_“Good morning.” Hangyul says._

_“Good morning.” Yohan says back. He holds his breath because he thinks he knows what his best friend is gonna say next. He’d already heard it twice and if he hears it again, Yohan will scream._

_“I’m so lucky.”_

_Yohan doesn’t scream._

_Instead, he whispers “Me too.”_

—

When the movie ends, they talk about the ending for a little while before Yohan realizes that he hasn’t showered yet upon reaching home because he immediately plopped down to watch with Hangyul.

He pads to his room to freshen up and puts on his pajamas. He lays on his bed, scrolling through some messages in the group chat he and Hangyul had with their other friends, when his phone begins to vibrate and Hangyul’s smiling face appears on the screen. Yohan rolls his eyes and bites on his lower lip in an attempt to stop the forming smile because this is all too familiar.

He answers the call and, before the younger could speak, says, “Let me guess: you watched a really scary movie and you think there’s something making noise outside, so now you want me to stay with you?”

“...” Hangyul doesn’t say anything but Yohan hears him sigh.

“Hangyul..?” Yohan prompts. He covers his mouth so he doesn’t laugh out loud. That would be rude.

“... just open your door, I’m outside.” comes his best friend’s reply. Yohan jumps out of bed to unlock his door, already cackling. _Knew it._

Hangyul, wrapped up in his own blanket, pushes the laughing Yohan away as he enters and wordlessly bounds over to his bed. He lays down, leaving some space for the bed owner’s body and turns so his back is against Yohan. The mattress dips down with his best friend’s weight.

After a few moments of silence, Yohan speaks up.

“Do you want me to hold your hand?”

“Shut up.” His best friend groans.

Again— silence. 

Yohan almost forgets that this is the same best friend who proposed to him twice last month.

”Yohan?” Hangyul whispers. 

”Yes?” Yohan whispers back. He holds his breath because he thinks he knows what his best friend is gonna say next. He’d already heard it twice and if he hears it again, Yohan will scream.

  
_“Hand.”_

Yohan doesn’t scream.

Instead, he reaches for Hangyul.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here’s some Halloween fluff for y’all :3 sorry this took so long but i hope u like it!!!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another Halloween themed chapter as requested— what would yohangyul dress up as?

“What are you dressing up as?” Hangyul asks Yohan for the nth time that day. He’s leaning against Yohan’s room’s doorframe and Yohan really regrets not closing his door.

“The answer is the same as the last six times you’ve asked me,” Yohan says, not looking up from his phone as he lies on his bed. “I don’t know yet. And yes, I’ve been counting. Plus your three text messages.”

“What do you mean you don’t know yet?” Hangyul asks, rubbing his temples and looking more stressed than Yohan. And he isn’t even the one being pressured about his costume for the annual Halloween party this one fraternity from their university always hosts. NC-something? Neo-something? Their name isn’t even in Greek and Yohan’s not sure they were even a fraternity. Just this group of 21 boys living in a huge house. “The party’s tonight. You must have some idea.”

Right. In a few hours, they’ll be in a spooky-fied house packed with intoxicated people in weird-ass costumes, drinking and dancing like there’s no tomorrow. Yohan can only imagine how tiring it’s gonna be. But he and his friends have all been hit with a flurry of papers and quizzes this week so, hey, they deserve it.

“I’ll just grab a white shirt and write ‘costume’ on it or something.” Yohan says tonelessly. He hears a gasp from Hangyul and immediately realizes that he said the worst thing possible in front of his best friend.

“Take that back, Yohan!” Hangyul screeches and it makes Yohan flinch.

“Why does it matter anyway? Everyone’s gonna be too drunk to notice.” He really didn’t have the nerve to tell Hangyul that he forgot about dressing up on Halloween. Plus, he was feeling petty— costumes were always such a hassle.

“I wanted to match with you.” Yohan could hear Hangyul pout from a few meters away. He looks up at his sulking best friend and sighs. How can anyone expect him to resist the supposed love of his life?

“Well, the costume shop is just a few blocks away and we still got time.” Yohan says, getting up. Hangyul grins and goes to get his and Yohan’s coats.

They practically run to the costume shop because the autumn wind was particularly chilly that afternoon.

Half an hour has passed and nothing catches their attention. Yohan pulls a face at the skeleton jumpsuit that Hangyul shows him. He pulls the same face when a Chewbacca mask is thrown at him. It was cool but he would like something less suffocating while he dances later.

Yohan makes Hangyul laugh when he puts an Elsa gown over his frame and swishes around. Yohan finds a bunny onesie but was disappointed to see its tail ripped off.

Yohan sees the children’s section and smiles, feeling nostalgic. He and Hangyul have been Woody and Buzz, Thing 1 and Thing 2, and Mario and Luigi too many times when they were kids. He gets an idea and runs to a clothes rack he’d passed before.

“Hey, Gyul, I have an idea.” Yohan sifts through the clothes and takes out the costumes he had in mind. “Do you remember in second grade, when we—“

Yohan looks at Hangyul.

And then at the two hangers he was holding up for Yohan to see.

They were tuxedos; one black and one white. Yohan’s breath gets caught in his throat because Hangyul’s just standing there, smiling at him.

“...Is that what you want to..” Yohan starts, words laced with caution. Hangyul always, always catches him off guard like this.

“Wear to the party?” Hangyul finishes for him. He laughs and Yohan’s heart aches. “No. There’s a proper time for these, right?”

Yohan knows what Hangyul is hinting at and his heart finds its way up his throat. He nods, as he watches Hangyul put the suits back on the rack.

“Like around December.” Hangyul continues and Yohan loses control of his speaking ability.

“I’m not getting married in the middle of winter, Gyul.” Yohan slaps his hand onto his mouth. Hangyul pauses, clearly surprised too. But then he laughs and it’s the most happy Yohan has seen him look all week.

“Okay.” Hangyul says softly as he steps toward Yohan, closer than necessary. “We’ll talk about it.”

Yohan doesn’t say anything back and instead does the most ‘Yohan’ thing— he gay panics.

He thrusts the costume he’s been holding onto Hangyul’s chest; maybe a bit too hard because then Hangyul’s coughing slightly. He scurries to the fitting room, cheeks flushed pink, almost knocking a mannequin down.

Only then when he’s hidden himself inside the tiny cubicle does Yohan find out that the costume he brought with him is Luffy’s and not Ichigo’s, like he meant to.

When they younger, he and Hangyul had constantly fought over which anime was better: One Piece or Bleach. Yohan was delighted to know that the shop offered costumes from both shows. Yohan had been a bigger Bleach fan so he thought he’d dress up as Ichigo and Hangyul not only loves One Piece, but he also enjoys parading his sculpted abs so Yohan knew the younger would like the idea of wearing just Luffy’s vest.

But noooo. Yohan just had to short circuit and switch their costumes. And he was too prideful to admit to Hangyul that he made a mistake because he couldn’t think of anything else other than marrying the hell out of his best friend.

Yohan spent the entire night battling the cold as he walked around the party with his chest and abdomen exposed.

Hangyul thought he couldn’t get any cuter. He would later take off a layer of his costume to give to Yohan to wrap himself with as they go home.

Hangyul expected a ‘thank you’ but all he got was a “You couldn’t have done that hours ago in the party?” from Yohan when he gives the garment to his tipsy (and freezing) best friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is this fic getting a bit too dragging? i honestly have no idea on how to end the fic; i’m just going with the flow (and even fulfilling suggestions)
> 
> hope u like this chapter!! peep that nct mention, as well as the Bleach and One Piece references~


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what’s fluff without a dog café?

“Quick, Yohan, lend me a fork.” Wooseok tells him as he approaches his friends’ table in the school cafeteria.

“What? Why?” Yohan sets his things on the ground and takes a seat. Hangyul was engaged in a conversation with Seungyoun and the older of the two has his hand on the other’s shoulder, trying to console him. Yohan has a feeling he knows what Hangyul is going on about. He smiles at Junho and Eunsang before returning his attention to Wooseok.

“So I can stab myself with it because I’d rather do that than hear Hangyul talk about the stupid dog café.” Wooseok dramatically slumps over the table, earning chuckles from Junho and Eunsang. Yohan laughs, relating to his hyung’s dilemma.

Hangyul had passed by a newly opened dog café near the shop he worked at the other day and have been wanting to visit ever since. He wasn’t able to enter because he was late for his shift. His Wednesday class schedule wouldn’t let him visit, too. Hangyul was feeling unmotivated these days and he was convinced that “quality time with the fluffy balls of happiness” would give him the will to finish his presentation in one of his major classes.

“Why doesn’t he just, I don’t know— _go_?” Junho asks innocently. Wooseok laughs, rolls his eyes and looks pointedly at Eunsang.

“Because, babe,” Eunsang starts, glancing at Yohan for effect. “He’s waiting for Yohan-hyung to take him.”

Junho laughs and looks at Yohan, whose cheeks turn pink.

“They’re younger than you but less dense, Yohan.” Wooseok taunts.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Yohan could only pout. His mind is going crazy, but he doesn’t mention anything. Was it true? Is the reason why Hangyul keeps bringing up the dog café around him because he wants Yohan to take him? “He wants us all to go, doesn’t he?”

“Well, yeah, but Junho’s allergic and Wooseok-hyung, Seungyoun-hyung and Seungwoo-hyung are tired of the two of you dancing around each other so, no thank you. We appreciate the thought, though.” Eunsang tells him, a little too soft for someone showing a bit of attitude. He’s been spending too much time with Wooseok. And what did he mean ‘_dancing around each other_’?

“Speaking of Seungwoo,” Wooseok starts to gather his things and food tray. “Babe, we have to go. Seungwoo’s class is ending soon.”

Seungyoun smiles apologetically at Hangyul before saying, “I’ll go with you next time, bro. I really wanna see the shiba inus.”

The two wave goodbye and Hangyul scoots over closer to Yohan. Maybe if Eunsang and Junho stopped giggling like little children, Yohan could _breathe_. Hangyul must’ve taken out a small poster while he was talking with Seungyoun because he’s waving it around his friends’ faces.

“They’re having 70% off of their drinks until tomorrow, too!” Hangyul whines. He really isn’t gonna let this go. “I know you can’t resist discounted coffee, Eunsang.”

“Really sorry, hyung.” Junho says. “Forgot to bring my medication for my allergies today. How about tomorrow?”

“But I have dance practice.” Hangyul pouts and then turns his attention to Yohan, eyebrows up as if asking him a question. He really wants to go, too, but he has to work at the daycare today. He plays the piano every Thursday and the kids can’t miss that.

Yohan opens his mouth to speak but someone beats him to it.

“Is that for the new dog café down the street?” A girl asks. Yohan doesn’t know who she is and by the looks of Junho and Eunsang, they didn’t either.

“Yeah, I haven’t been inside but they gave me a flyer when I passed by.” Hangyul’s voice livens up and Yohan doesn’t like it. “Hey, you’re in my Dance theory class!”

The girl laughs and Yohan doesn’t like it, too.

“I actually know the owner so if you’d like, I can go with y—“ The girl doesn’t get to finish because then, Junho kicks Yohan from under the table and the elder yelps loudly.

“What’s wrong?” Of course Hangyul’s the one to ask. He really does look genuinely concerned but Yohan doesn’t know what to tell him._ Please don’t go with what’s-her-name to the café because I’m getting pretty jealous and you haven’t asked me to marry you again so— oh my god you didn’t change your mind, did you?_ doesn’t seem appropriate.

“Yohan-hyung’s free to go today, aren’t you?” Eunsang saves Yohan from blurting out something embarrassing.

The girl must have felt like she was intruding on something and picked up on what was happening because she’s quick to wave Hangyul goodbye, telling him she’d see him tomorrow. Yohan, again, doesn’t like it.

“You don’t have to go to the daycare?” Hangyul smiles expectantly at Yohan and Yohan panics internally. _What the hell, Eunsang?_

“He doesn’t.” Junho says for him. He starts to stand up, Eunsang following blindly because he’s typing something on his phone. “Sorry, hyungs, but that’s our cue.”

The two leave and Yohan receives a message.

_ **From: Eunsangie** _

_ **I’ll catch your shift today, hyung. The kids might find the violin interesting. You owe me.** _

He receives another one.

_ **From: Seokkie** _

_ **Eunsang told me what happened. Thank God for those two. Don’t mess this up, I’m begging you.** _

He receives another.

_ **From: ChaCha** _

_ **Enjoy your date, hyung. Use your words xo** _

Yohan flips his phone over so he doesn’t see the screen of shame. It’s totally not a date. Just two friends going out for coffee and petting cute dogs in the process.

“It’s fine,” Yohan tells Hangyul, smiling. “I’d love to go with you.”

Hangyul pumps his hand in the air and whispers a ‘yes’.

Hangyul doesn’t pay attention to the texts from Seungyoun and Seungwoo.

_ **From: Seung-appa** _

_ **Seok told me. I’m just saying, you could’ve asked him directly.** _

_ **From: Seung-pabo** _

_ **Can’t believe your week-long whining worked. Have fun, loser.** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [for doeeyeboy]
> 
> they requested petty jealousy (like person A getting jealous of a child or a dog) <3
> 
> hope you guys liked it!!! part 2 soon, which will take place in the actual café :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> coffee shop confessions are a bit too mainstream, aren't they? yohan doesn't think so.

The dog café was pretty pleasant, and Yohan was having fun. Hangyul bought them both frappes and insisted that he pays. Of course, Yohan wouldn’t say no to free food. He was surprised there weren’t more customers inside, but he guesses he should be thankful instead because they can have the dogs’ attention.

The dogs were really cute, and they smelled nice. Some even had tiny shoes and Yohan almost burst when he went to pet a Yorkshire terrier and it offered its sneakered paw. There were tables everywhere but of course, he and Hangyul chose to sit on the floor. The café was cozy and had a rustic feel to it; soft music even played throughout the place.

Hangyul had a young brown Labrador napping on his lap as he’s lifting a very energetic and fluffy white Maltese to his face. Yohan quietly takes a picture of his beautiful view.

“Send it to me later, okay?” Hangyul surprises Yohan because Yohan didn’t think Hangyul saw him. Yohan nods as he playfully engages in a tug-of-war with a Beagle. “Niku”, its tag reads. No wonder the puppy was so attached to the fake steak chew toy.

“I’m really happy today, Yohan.” Hangyul speaks up again and Yohan is grateful. He’s always been more reserved than Hangyul and is often lost in thought – hesitant to speak his mind. Hangyul’s always been there, able to distinguish between Yohan choosing to let others speak before him and just listen and Yohan not being in the mood to talk. Nevertheless, Hangyul carries their conversations. “Thanks for being here with me.”

“Don’t mention it. This café is really nice, and I would’ve regretted not going.” Yohan tells his best friend. “Plus, I don’t think you would’ve lasted the week not going here. This dog café is probably the only thing on your mind these days.”

“That’s not true,” Hangyul has the audacity to look smug while still holding onto the Maltese that had taken a liking to his left arm. He’s running his right hand through its soft fur. He then looks down, ears starting to catch a tinge of pink. “You act like I don’t think about you, too.”

It’s Yohan’s turn to blush. He wants to say something but the butterflies in his stomach had flown up to his throat and prevented him from doing so. Instead, he takes a sip of his drink. He doesn’t comment on it and they go about petting more dogs that approach them and falling into a conversation about which dog breed was best to keep.

Yohan has barely managed to calm himself down from Hangyul’s not-so subtle flirting a while ago (_wait – that _was_ flirting, right?_) before the younger catches him off guard for the hundredth time.

“We’ll get one, okay?” Hangyul off-handedly comments, raising a black pug’s front paws and guiding it as it attempts to walk on two legs. “Or maybe a couple…”

“Get what?” Yohan muses, brows furrowed together in confusion.

“A dog.” Hangyul tells him like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Together.”

How Yohan managed to not scream, no one knows. He’s feeling too many things at the same time and his heart feels like it’s gonna explode sometime soon. He not only wants to scream – he also wants to _cry_.

He wants to tell his best friend that he wants to be more than what they are right now.

That he likes him.

A lot.

Loves him, even – no matter how scary it sounds.

That he wants to take him out on many more dog café dates like this, if that’s what it takes to make Hangyul smile that bright smile of his.

Yohan wants to tell Hangyul that he’s never thought of marriage before, but that day in the library got him picturing walking down the aisle towards the younger.

Yohan wants Hangyul to ask him to get married again so that he can smack his head and maybe, _just maybe_, Hangyul’s brain can reconnect some loose wires and get the idea that he has to ask Yohan out to a date properly first, before going to plan reception seat charts.

Lastly, Yohan wants to tell his best friend that a lot of things in life don’t make sense. But for him, Hangyul has been and always will be the only thing he’s sure of.

Oh, and he wants to tell Hangyul that he wants a shih tzu. And take him to the place downtown that sells cute dog clothes.

Thanks to his nerves though, what Yohan manages to say is: “Please stop making me fall in love with you more.”

Yohan barely has the time to recover from his mouth’s betrayal because Hangyul looks him straight in the eyes and smirks.

_“Not a chance.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [for doeeyeboy again!!!]
> 
> i hope y'all like this chapter <3 i have a paper due tomorrow but my brain is filled with fluff for yohangyul because i miss! them! so! much! (lmao but seriously tho i haven't started yet pls pray for my soul)
> 
> writing this fic feels like a stress reliever for me so if you guys have any requests, do comment and i'll try working on them :) i'm tired of writing academic papers, uni sucks so much so i want to keep my imagination running haha 
> 
> thanks for the kudos and kind comments!!!! they really encourage me <3
> 
> *also, Niku in Japanese means 'meat' if you guys didn't know. I was having a hard time in my Japanese class because my Korean gets in the way so I just worked on this update in class


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which yohan and hangyul both get their hearts broken the right way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> song featured is ‘Break My Heart Right’ by James Bay (kindly listen to this first or while reading to get in your ‘feels’)

Where Hangyul gets the confidence to flirt with Yohan?

Top 10 mysteries of all time.

He’s nervous, yes. But he didn’t feel like he was testing waters as you would with someone you’d just met and you’re worried you’d drive them away.

Being sweet and domestic with Yohan felt natural. Like it’s been years since they were in love.

Of course, it was scary. Yohan had such a huge part in Hangyul’s life that he couldn’t afford to mess this up. He couldn’t imagine losing his best friend in the world.

And that’s why Hangyul thought that the best way to not lose his friend... was to marry him.

He’s not just saying that because he’s afraid of meeting someone new and getting let down. He knows that what he feels for Yohan isn’t just because of proximity or familiarity or some shallow shit psychology says are the reasons you get attracted to someone.

Yohan is beautiful. Inside and out. And Hangyul has had the privilege of seeing both— of getting to see the parts of Yohan he doesn’t dare show anyone else.

Hangyul feels the same way. With Yohan, there was nothing he wanted to hide. He didn’t feel the need to pretend to impress him because Yohan already knows him better than anyone. He could be his true self around him and not care about being judged.

He knows he wants to take care of Yohan for as long as the universe allows him to. It’s what he does best— making Yohan happy. Hangyul hopes he’s really making a positive impact in Yohan’s life the way the elder does with him.

Since the day Yohan had said the L word, there had been small but meaningful changes. Changes you wouldn’t notice unless you were Hangyul who loses interest in his surroundings as soon as Yohan gets close.

There had been more trips to the library together.

More nights cuddled in their couch, talking animatedly after a movie.

More dinners together— bumping hips and shoulders as Yohan stirs the soup and Hangyul cuts the vegetables, squeezed in their tiny apartment kitchen.

More subtle touches, like Hangyul’s hand lingering longer than usual on Yohan’s back as he stirs them both through the school’s hallways. Like Yohan’s hand absentmindedly resting on Hangyul’s thigh as they sit together with their friends.

More of Yohan wearing Hangyul’s sweaters.

More of Hangyul borrowing Yohan’s cardigans.

More glances at each other. More smiles. More hand-holding.

But Hangyul wants _more_.

He wants to take Yohan out on a date. Ask him to be his boyfriend. _Maybe kiss him?_

God, he’s so whipped but he wouldn’t change a thing.

***

It was a Friday night and Hangyul had no plans of leaving the warm apartment he shared with Yohan.

Speaking of Yohan, he was usually the first one to get home on Fridays, except Hangyul’s dance practice ended early and his best friend got stuck in one of his composition classes.

Hangyul had connected his phone to the speakers in their living room. He had the music on shuffle, looking for a song to dance to for their bi-weekly evaluations. He didn’t have any homework so he’s just walking around the room, swaying to whatever comes on in case he gets an idea for a choreography.

He hears the door click about an hour later and in comes Yohan, face flushed. From the cool wind outside, Hangyul guesses. It was November now and the weather’s getting colder.

“Hey,” Yohan greets as he’s putting his things down on the floor. “What are you doing?”

“Conceptualizing.” Hangyul shrugs. He steps closer to Yohan and takes out his hand. “Dance with me?”

“W-what?” Yohan giggles, a hint of exhaustion from a whole day in school, but he takes Hangyul’s hand anyway.

“Just sway, come on.” Hangyul smiles, pulling Yohan closer. “No pop and locking.”

Yohan laughs at that. “You better not show off.”

“I won’t,” Hangyul makes a gesture on his chest of crossing his heart. He takes both of Yohan’s hands. “Now sway.”

“I’m tired, Hangyul.” Yohan half-heartedly complains, but he does sway to the music.

“Poor baby.” And Hangyul does the most unexpected thing. He tugs at Yohan softly and hugs him. Now they’re swaying together, in sync. “Rest after this.”

Yohan nods, hugging his best friend back. Hangyul was a little bit shorter than him so his blonde hair tickles his face, but it was fine.

It was more than fine.

“For now, just...” Hangyul breathes out, hugging him tighter. “Stay with me, okay?”

“Okay.” Yohan whispers, voice shaking. He doesn’t know why he’s whispering. There’s no one around them to hear anyway. It was just him and Hangyul, in a warm embrace, as soft music plays around them.

_Someday we're gonna get to do all the things that we wanted to_

Yohan had imagined dancing with his significant other in an intimate way like this. But the way this was making him feel— it was so overwhelming.

_Never wanna say goodbye_   
_You always see through my disguise_

The way Hangyul managed to tear down his walls in the most delicate manner. The way loving him didn’t have to hurt unlike what he’d experienced in the past.

_You're the one who breaks my heart right_

It was scary. Like it was all too good to be true. And a part of Yohan wants to hold back. To not risk. To not cross the line.

_You tear me up and wreck my dreams_   
_I hold your hand when I'm asleep_

The way Hangyul is holding him, however, ever so gentle, has Yohan thinking that maybe his best friend was ready to cross said line.

_I don't mind falling for a lifetime_   
_'Cause you break my heart right_

Hangyul was just waiting for him to cross it together.

_Be tender and honest_   
_And sometimes say words that hurt_

Because that’s the way it was supposed to be right?

Yohan and Hangyul: _together_, like always.

_I'll hold all your troubles_   
_Even if you won't_

Hangyul begins to pull away and Yohan stops the urge to bring him closer. Hangyul only gets far enough to face Yohan.

_Someday we're gonna get to do all the things that we wanted to, yeah_

Hangyul reaches out to touch Yohan’s face. Yohan’s mind almost goes blank. _Almost_.

Because then, Hangyul is swiping his thumb under his eyes.

_Never gonna say goodbye_   
_You always see through my disguise_

Yohan didn’t realize he was crying. Why was he crying? He smiles sheepishly at Hangyul, a bit shy at his display of emotions. His best friend only laughs fondly.

_You're the one who makes my heart right_

“I’m going to take you out on a date tomorrow, is that okay?” Hangyul asks him softly.

_You tear me up and wreck my dreams_   
_I hold your hand when I'm asleep_

“Yes.” Yohan smiles, reaching for Hangyul’s hand which was still caressing his face. Hangyul’s other hand was still wrapped around his waist.

_I don't mind falling for a lifetime_

“6PM,” Hangyul chuckles for extra effect. “I’ll pick you up at 6PM.”

_'Cause you break my heart right_

“Pick me up?” Yohan laughs at that. He hits Hangyul in the chest, his best friend dodging a bit too late. “We live in the same apartment, idiot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> of course my otp’s gonna have a slow dance moment !!! as soon as i listened to ‘Break My Heart Right’, i knew it was yohangyul’s song
> 
> this is all really self-indulgent fluff; i hope you guys like it <3


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this wasn’t part of Hangyul’s plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the song ‘Taxi’ by The Maine inspired this chapter; give it a listen while you read <3
> 
> (best to start at the part where i put a “#”)

**Hangyul had a foolproof plan.** Guess.

Yep, a **_horror movie date._**

Does he enjoy watching horror movies? No.

Does he get nightmares after watching one? Definitely.

He didn’t even get to finish the first Scream movie.

But why a horror movie date, you ask?

First of all, movie dates are romantic as hell.

Sharing a bucket of popcorn. Holding hands. Leaning your head against your soulmate’s shoulder. Holding hands again. Discussing the movie afterwards. Walking out of the theater holding hands.

Maybe Hangyul is a bit obsessed with holding Yohan’s hands but it’s none of your business.

Anyway, going to the cinemas to watch a horror movie is a bonus because Yohan loves scary movies and knows that Hangyul is a complete baby.

That means Yohan’s hands covering Hangyul’s eyes. Yohan laughing fondly at him as he cuddles to his best friend’s side (out of fright, of course). Hangyul clutching Yohan’s hand and getting away with it because Yohan knows it will comfort him through the movie.

So, no, Hangyul wasn’t looking forward to watching a movie he’s going to spend money on tickets for. He was just in it for a cute date like the one he’d seen in a romcom before, where the main couple fed each other popcorn and even stole kisses in the dimly lit cinema. Hangyul wanted to combust when “I love you”s were whispered between the two.

Hangyul was going to take Yohan out to a horror movie date. Nothing could go wrong.

Except the movie was _too scary_— for both Hangyul and Yohan, who prided himself in being an avid horror movie fan. Horror movies don’t really scare him but Hangyul just had to pick an exception.

The popcorn was left unnoticed and their hands were too occupied covering their eyes for jumpscares. Yohan didn’t get to cover Hangyul’s because he was too busy hiding behind his. No stealing glances at the other. Not even a peck on the cheek from Hangyul to Yohan. It wasn’t just them who thought the film was frightening; everyone in the cinema was screaming because the movie was that intense. So, that’s a no on whispering a sweet “I’m in love with you” in Yohan’s ears.

The movie was really good though. Hangyul couldn’t help but focus because the story was interesting and the plot twists were carefully thought out. They didn’t realize how fast the time went, too engrossed in the film, only to be surprised when the credits started rolling. Both boys felt exhausted— drained off of their energy due to the heightened emotions brought about by the film. They were out of breath, as though they’d run a marathon.

When they walked out side by side, they could only laugh at everything that had transpired. Their first date was interesting so far.

“That was intense,” Yohan lets out a breath, laughing. Soft and cute, Hangyul thinks, looking over his best friend tucked in a tan overcoat, layered on top of a cream-colored sweater paired with beige pants and brown boots. A light scarf hangs around his neck. They’re walking side by side as Hangyul leads them down a street, probably to where they’ll settle down for dinner. “I had fun, but what made you think of that for a date?”

“How was I supposed to know it was gonna be that scary?” Hangyul pouts, looking cute in contrast to his darker outfit that comprised of a striped turtleneck shirt, black leather jacket, black pants and sneakers. Their outfits tonight spoke a lot about their personalities— Yohan being more calm and reserved, and Hangyul who’s full of energy and carefree. They complemented each other, Yohan muses to himself. “I wanted to hold your hand but I was too busy shielding my eyes. Sorry.”

[#] Yohan glances at Hangyul who was busy swinging his head around, taking in the details of the very alleyway they were walking on. He stops and Hangyul does the same, just a few steps ahead. Hangyul looks at him questioningly.

“You can hold my hand now.” Yohan tells him softly, as he removes his hand from his pocket. “But it’s a bit cold and clammy...”

He watches his best friend as Hangyul approaches him, stopping just a few inches away.

“I don’t mind.” Hangyul chuckles as he takes Yohan’s hand in his. They continue walking in comfortable silence, hands swaying a bit with every step. Their fingers are interlaced and Yohan feels elated— like an inflated balloon has taken residence inside his stomach. Once in a while, Hangyul looks at him and just smiles. He’s over the moon happy like this.

This is the first time they’ve been on an official, romantic date but the feeling is all too familiar.

The wind is cold but it’s not too harsh. With Hangyul next to him, Yohan feels warm inside. He feels secure like this, their hands linked without a care in the world. He feels free, no longer having to hide his feelings for his best friend because it turns out Hangyul felt the same way towards him. 

The moment Hangyul expressed his desire to marry Yohan, he had argued that they couldn’t possibly get married without dating first. And here they were, walking down a road they both knew very well.

“Hey,” Hangyul spoke up. Yohan didn’t notice that they’ve stopped walking. “I know it’s no fancy restaurant but—“

“There’s nothing to feel sorry about, Gyul.” Yohan tugs at Hangyul’s arm to make him stop talking. He didn’t want an apology. He breathes out. “This is perfect.”

Hangyul lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. When he had asked Yohan out on a date on impulse as they were slow dancing in their living room, he spent the entire night thinking of where to take him. They weren’t completely broke college students; just two boys from decent families, trying to live independently so Hangyul knew he should try and avoid anything that was too expensive. Nonetheless, he had started looking up fancy restaurants on his laptop when his eyes fell to the small picture frame on his desk. It was a picture of him and Yohan, a couple of years younger, smiling in the middle of taking off their bike helmets. It was taken at the same place they were at as of the moment: Yeouido Hangang Park. 

“Really?” Hangyul asks and Yohan nods in response. “I just... You know you deserve the best, right, Yohan?”

Yohan smiles at that. He shyly looks down. “I know.”

He doesn’t know where he gets the confidence from, but he pulls Hangyul closer and runs his hand through the younger’s hair that was messed up slightly by the wind. “And I’ve got it right here.”

Hangyul mutters a soft but fond “Aish...” and pulls Yohan to the direction of the nearby convenience store. They each select ramen, sausages, kimbap and cola. They find a nice spot by the grass and sit down to eat, using Yohan’s scarf as a picnic blanket.

“I figured you missed this.” Hangyul speaks up as he watches Yohan staring out into the open. Yohan nods and smiles in agreement.

They used to spend a lot of time riding their bikes around the park when they were in high school. They would stop to rest and eat ramen together, too. They often had routines like these— traditions throughout their friendship. It was in this exact same park that they had talked about their dreams and fears and worries and current favorite musicians. Yohan is reminded of how much they’ve grown as friends and individuals. He couldn’t imagine a life without Hangyul by his side. A huge part of him knows that we was well aware of this even before he started seeing Hangyul as more than a friend.

These past few months, all Yohan has known is that he wanted Hangyul— his company, his attention, his affections. Hangyul made it clear that he wanted the same from Yohan, too. Both obviously liked the other. Both tried to express their feelings towards the other. A bit of flirting over here and skinship over there, but both were afraid of taking things further. Yohan understood what Eunsang had meant about them ‘dancing around each other’. But now...

“Penny for your thoughts?” Yohan didn’t realize he had zoned out again until Hangyul clears his throat.

“Sorry.” Yohan says shyly. He takes a sip of his cola. He faces Hangyul. “I just... Isn’t this a little bit overwhelming?”

Hangyul frowns. He is silent for a few moments. “...Are you having second thoughts?”

“What? No!” It’s Yohan’s turn to be surprised. He sighs. “I realized how long I’ve been waiting for this to happen... for us to happen and...”

“And...?” Hangyul urges him, an understanding smile on his face.

“And now we’re here,” Yohan gestures to both of them and then their surroundings. “We’re dating and... I’ve waited for this for so long and now that it’s real... It’s scary to think of what’s going to happen to us next.”

Hangyul doesn’t say anything. Yohan knows he’s thinking of a response but is quick to apologize for thinking such foolish thoughts anyway. “I’m sorry, it’s stupid—“

Hangyul reaches out and pulls him close. Hangyul’s hands are on Yohan’s shoulders as he plants a soft but hurried kiss on Yohan’s forehead. Yohan melts against him and they stay in the warmth of each other’s embrace.

“It’s not stupid.” Hangyul tells him, hand soothing Yohan’s back. “It’s scary, Han, I know. We’re putting so much on the line. A part of me wants to go back to the way things used to be, but another part tells me I can’t be fully happy if I don’t get to call you mine. Things will stop being complicated after some time— don’t you think so? I can’t tell you to stop thinking that way because getting worried is not your fault. But I want to reassure you that you do have me now, Yohan, and I’m not going anywhere. We don’t know how things will turn out in the future for sure. But I do know this: I’m with you 100%. We’re here together, at this exact moment. Try not to think about what comes next...”

Everything Hangyul had said sounded so genuine, it made Yohan’s heart ache for thinking negatively. Too many things he’d ruined by thinking too much and doubting whether he deserved it or not. Too many good things he had let go because of the fear of getting used to being happy and having the source of his happiness taken away.

This was Hangyul, _his_ Hangyul, we were talking about. Yohan convinces himself that he wasn’t gonna let something as beautiful as what they have go. He was going to make Hangyul’s days brighter and easier, just as what the other does to him. Yohan wants Hangyul to be happy and he believes he’s the right person for that. Yohan decides he’s going to do his best to become a better person capable of taking care of Hangyul. It’s what his best friend deserves.

“... us, two. Think of this.” Hangyul continues, sniffling, and Yohan frowns, hating knowing his best friend was crying. “_**Just this.**_”

*** BONUS ***  


** From: Seung-pabo **

** look at you, being yohan’s boyfriend and all **

** To: Seung-pabo **

** ...about that **

** From: Seung-pabo **

** hangyul no **

** To: Seung-pabo **

** hangyul yes **

**  
** ** ### **

** From: Seokkie **

** so are you boyfriends now? **

** To: Seokkie **

** uhh **

** From: Seokkie **

** i’m guessing neither of you brought it up... **

** yohan **

** yohan are you crying **

** yohan no **

** To: Seokkie **

** yohan yes **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the slow updates!! been pretty busy with school :( 
> 
> anyway i hope you like this chapter!! + the bonus part hahahaha the fluff doesn’t end here!! witness yohangyul struggle with how to become official boyfriends in the next chapters lol
> 
> i’m thinking of a RyeonSeungSeok or JunSang spin off soon (or after this fic), what do you guys think? 
> 
> shoutout to doeeyeboy because we thought about the same thing for their date (something going wrong or not according to plan) hahahaha


	14. update

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [will delete]

this isn’t really an update to the story but i just want to let everyone know that i do intend to continue this fic

i know it’s been weeks since i last updated but i just got a little busy in school 

++ i’m a multi and a lot of the groups i stan had/are having their comebacks

moreover, woojin left stray kids and now wonho from monsta x ☹️ they’re 2 of the groups that i’m particularly attached to so i’m really sad because it’s so sudden and they happened immediately following the other; because of this, i find myself unable to write anything

but i promise you more fluffs in the future!!!

will probably end this multi-chaptered fic soon and focus on one-shots instead to add to the still dry ‘yohangyul’ tag *sigh*

if you guys have any suggestions/requests, i’d appreciate them!!

**Author's Note:**

> the overwhelming lack of yohangyul fics and aus has led to me writing about them even though i suck fjfkfkf updates will probably be short and slow i’m sorryyy
> 
> n e wayz, kudos/comments/suggestions are v much appreciated <3


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